Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Communication Tips - The Wisdom of 390 Years of Marriage Experience



Communication, conflict, sex - fourteen married couples, representing a total of 390 years of marriage, were asked what tips they would share with a newlywed couple about building a strong, healthy, satisfying relationship.
Here are their uncensored tips related to the importance of communication:

  • Learn everything you can about effective communication - it is a skill that can be learned and developed - learn and use good communication skills - learning is not enough
  • Eliminate from your patterns of communication behaviors you brought into the relationship that don't work • Speak your spouse's "love language" every day
  • Learn to really listen to your mate - the goal of listening is to understand your partner
  • Pay attention to nonverbal cues when talking or listening - communication is more than words - it also includes tone of voice, facial expression and body language
  • Call an official "time out" when you feel your emotions getting out of control

Why does the wisdom of 390 years of marriage speak to the importance of communication? It's foundational to a good relationship!

  • Do you need to talk about sex? You need good communication skills!
  • Do you need to talk about money? You need good communication skills!
  • Do you need to talk about in-laws? You need good communication skills!
  • Do you need to talk about parenting? You need good communication skills!

What are good communication skills?

  • Speaking for self - you cannot read your partner's mind, so you cannot speak for them.
  • Using "I" messages rather than "You" messages. For an effective I message, fill in these blanks: I feel __________________________ (state your feeling) when you _______________________(describe the action or behavior)because________________________(say why the action connects to your feeling)
  • Listening to your partner with the goal of understanding his or her message.
  • Paying attention to your partner's tone of voice, facial expression and body language in addition to his or her words.
  • Expressing your feelings, wants and desires in addition to your thoughts and opinions.
  • Listening for your partner's feelings, wants and desires in addition to his or her thoughts and opinions. Don't hear them? Ask!

If it's worth talking about, it's worth using good communication skills. We're not victims to bad habits of communication - new skills, habits and patterns of communication can be learned.
Keep reading. Keep learning. Keep growing!
Married for 33 years, Greg and Priscilla Hunt are certified Specialists in Marriage Enrichment, Couple Communication Instructor Trainers, Prepare-Enrich Seminar Directors and Mentoring for Better Marriages Trainers. Greg is a consultant and author. Priscilla is Executive Director of Better Marriages: Association for Couples in Marriage Enrichment. The Hunts are known for their energetic, creative and thought-provoking style of presenting.


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Treatment For Premature Ejaculation - How You Can Last Up to 5 Times Longer in Sex With These Tips

You might not realize it but premature ejaculation is a common problem. A lot of men have it and are trying to find treatment for premature ejaculation that works. Before you go around finding exercises, pills and sprays to help get rid of the problem, you have to understand first what caused it in the first place.

For starters, one of the common causes of premature ejaculation is excessive masturbation -- trying to release your load too fast without realizing that it has become a habit that is not so easily remedied. Minor cases of premature ejaculation are due to genetics -- some are just born to release their load too early for comfort. Now that you understand the cause of premature ejaculation, here are some of the treatments available to overcome the problem.

1. Condom

That's right; one of the most useful strategies to stop premature ejaculation in its tracks is through the use of a thick condom. Having a thick covering on your penis during sex reduces the sensation on your penis -- making it possible to lengthen your sexual performance by delaying your release.

2. Pills and Sprays

Medical innovation introduced pills and sprays to temporarily overcome premature ejaculation during sex. Doctors advice their charges to use these treatment a few minutes before intercourse to let the medicine seep through your penis and help delayed ejaculation.

3. Exercise

The above methods are just temporary solution to the problem. If you really want to avoid this embarrassing moment in the future; why not go for treatment for premature ejaculation that will get rid of it once and for all.

One way to do that is to train your pubococcygeus muscle through Kegel exercise. This muscle group is found in between your anus and scrotum that control flow of urine, blood, even semen to your penis. The exercise program aims to allow an individual to tighten their PB muscle at will when they feel that they are about to come. Not only that; this method can also be used to prolong erection that is necessary for a satisfying sexual performance.

Finding One That Works

It is best to consult your doctor first before you try out the above treatment for premature ejaculation to guarantee that what you try out will work for you. It is also a good idea to do a little research beforehand to see if one technique works better than the others. Though many would go into trial-by-error at this point; you might want to take time to check out reviews and testimonies of men who tried these out to see if they work or not to avoid wasting time.
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Sex Tips for Guys


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How to Be a Good Conversationalist


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